Letting go

Linking objects - relics, which remind us of a deceased loved one can be - a source of consolation. A widow can be seen to bear her husband's, for example. A son of his father's golf clubs can be a survivor. These objects, we feel close to the loved ones we lost. Recently I came across a Object Linking, in fact, a link message from my deceased daughter.

I cleaned the kitchen junk drawer desk. As I leafed through a pile of crumpled paper, I found a Christmas card she gave us years ago. It included the traditional "Merry Christmas" message, but my daughter memo was exceptional, and I could tell that she was in a hurry when she wrote it.

Your reference: "Thank you for everything you have done for us. I am very grateful to you as parents and friends have. I'm sure glad that I had to keep a family together with me through another growing experience. I just wanted you to know what a great help you've been and to your love, care and effort has helped us a lot. John and Haley could not be better parents. "

My husband and I remember the card. We got it when our daughter was in a divorce. The note meant a lot to us and will mean even more to us today. In our twin grandchildren lost their mother in a car accident, and her father in another incident, court appointed us as guardians and financial conservators.

Raising teenagers and sad at the same time is the hardest thing we ever did. While we tried to be optimistic for our grandchildren, we were letting our beloved deceased. Marilyn J. Mason writes about the challenge to let go of his book "Making Our Lives Our Own: A Woman's Guide to Six Challenges of Personal Change."

Letting go is not a sign of defeat, or lack of control, "says Mason, it is only the initial stage of a journey. When we let go, we begin to solve. According to Mason, the department is not passive, but active, and come out peacefully. Developed over time in the department of acceptance. "We feel only joy because we know suffering," she writes.

I am now here. Although many have found solace in the linking of files, I found consolation appears in this context. When I read the letter, I feel my daughter for me to speak. In fact, I can hear her voice and see her smile. The words "love" and "concern" to say why we named our daughter as guardian for their children. Your use of the word "friend" is also touching.

University of Washington Counseling Center shortcut object is called to read on a website, "Healthy grief." Wear or carry out an Object Linking is one of the suggestions in the article. "You can count the time in the future when you no longer need this memory and gently let it go," the article is. This is wise advice for the linking of objects, but not necessarily for personal letters.

Instead, we will appreciate the card and keep it forever. Our daughter, the words "could not be better grandparent" is a source of energy in the coming years. We are almost twins get through high school. Now we have got them through school. My husband and I look forward to their graduation, in a letter to our daughter in her hand.